Today, from now on we are going to forget the old saying “People are created equal,” because the truth is we are not all equal. If we were equal, dating would not be such a problem in this world. The reason why dating is just so much darn fun is because we are not equal to each other to make it work. The goal in finding your special mate is to find someone that compliments you in a way that makes the two of you “equal” which throws out the theory of finding someone perfect for us. I am not sure if a perfect mate can even exist due to the fact that we evolve so much as we grow older. An equal person to us will evolve in the same direction as we do. I guess that can seem to be the same as “perfect”, but perfect is so “matter of fact”.
If we as individuals will never be perfect then it is pretty much impossible to find someone “perfect” for us. When people get married they become whole—well that’s the desired end result of marriage, at least. When you find someone that fits you equally it makes much more sense to become that whole entity people talk about. But not just any person can do that or fit that role in your life. Let’s not exclude homosexual relationships because this theory still can apply. Actually, this even applies to friendships too. It’s why some of us feel like kindred spirits when we are not even related. We cannot have a soul tie to certain people because we are simply not created equal—some of us though “are not created equal” in negative ways that will never compliment certain people we meet no matter what we do. This explains why some of us will never like certain people yet never really can’t explain it or even understand it, while some of us will like/love certain others no matter what.
When I think of this theory I think of people being like magnets. There is something that will pull us together or pull us apart but it is not always explainable. Keeping this in mind will help us not waste time trying to figure out why someone doesn’t like us, or why we can’t be friends, or ultimately why this man or woman just won’t want to be with us romantically. Ultimately that thinking is a real waste of time! Time better spent is to just simply keep it moving and find people that make us whole equally.
Disclaimer: It would be wise though we are not created equal to not walk around believing we are better than anyone. And don’t even think you are less than anyone either. Just not equal—in the sense that we all have our strengths and weaknesses collectively. Thinking this either way is just so unattractive.
All Content © 2011 Marika Dye
Marika:
I saw this documentary recently that addressed this idea scientifically. It was based solely on physical attraction.
hey created a focus group based on social standards of beauty. They dressed equal numbers of men and women exactly the same and even provided a skull caps so that hair styles could not come in to play.
The group was told to pair up with a member of the opposite sex.
At first every one went after the most physically attractive first. But slowly each level beauty ended up pairing up with their attraction-level counterpart.
The conclusion was that we all seek to mate with the same high standards of beauty, causing the most beautiful of both sexes to choose each other and win out over the rest.
I found this very interesting. But it makes sense in terms survival of the species. It tells me that we definitely seek our physically equal counterpart, even if we don't consciously realize it.
Interesting! Do you know the name of this documentary? It would be good for me to watch and then recap for this site. I think others would find this interesting!
I would love to see this… where can I get it?
Well, relationships and human behavior is one the most complex interactions to experience. I believe in finding the right person that is right for you. Perfect exists specifically for the situation or relationship as it is. What works for some will not work for everyone. I think couples and friends should create formula that suits the comfort level of each other.
Thank you for your input! Your thought on perfect is different from mine but I agree. Good job!
And creating that formula is one of the hardest things to do!
Agree. Whomever came up with the insane notion that we are is fooling themselves. I, in my bluntness, prefer to call them idiots. Every one of us has differing mental, social, economic, and physical abilities. The ONLY thing that matters is that we're able to use our OWN abilities to their fullest. This is why socialism (or as the president put it, "spread the wealth around")as a system of government is such an abject failure. It's based on the premise that we're all equal, which is a lie. The further removed control is (be it governmentally imposed or personally imposed, or imposed by some other being), the further a person's natural abilities can be maximized.
Glad we are on the same page!
The term is intended to mean equal value before God who loves us all equally. But, regrettably, you are right, we are not at all equal. Some, very, very few, simply have better character than most everyone else. I believe a lasting relationship is found with mutual respect and loyalty.
Why are our inequalities regrettable? Imagine the insipidity of equality; it is a fantasy land for which I'm unimaginably grateful that I am not a part.
That's beautiful way of rephrasing "We are created equal". Thanks for sharing that. Mutual respect and loyalty is very very important!
Yes, mutual respect and loyalty is important. A lasting relationship including admiration and attraction as well.
I think God has created us all equal, in the terms that he has given us all the same tools to work with.
A person of charter posssess a series of virtues or values that determine the level we put ourselves on. Coruption and lifestyles has changed the mannerisms in man and woman that effects our integrity, our self estem and our self worth. Linda
Very true Linda! Thanks for your input!
P.S. I miss you! xo
Dating; Why is dating so hard ? I think its because so many people judge a book by its cover, An dont take the time to really get to know each other.
Very true Shawn!