I have this friend that I love dearly; however, she will make plans with me and even confirm but will never show up—no call, no text, no email… NADA! In fact, she does this to everyone. Do you have a friend like this? You might be reading this and saying “Yeah You!” But don’t get this confused with just not being able to come out or saying later, “I can’t come out anymore!” Yes, that is what I sometimes do! But this is not what I am talking about.
I am talking about friends you have that will seem like they are all about coming out (it even was their idea) and then not even answer phone calls or text messages for the remainder of the day. And I mean answer your phone calls, to be exact. Then, maybe you get worried and through investigation you find out they had their phone was with them all damn day. Like perhaps you find out from a mutual friend that this person has been texting or even calling them throughout the day or you decide to check on them personally and consequently see them even holding the damn phone in their hand. Most of the time these people will say, “Oh no! I didn’t even see your calls or hear the phone!” Sound familiar? Trust me, they heard the phone. I personally think that this kind of behavior is rude. However, this kind of behavior seems to be common.
So listen up rude people! It is inconsiderate to make plans with someone and then not even call to cancel, because you have no idea what the other person has planned around your time together. They might have actually canceled plans for you. So that you know, I have had to even learn this with making plans to call people. I am admittedly the worst at calling people even when I say I will unless you are talking about putting me to work or there is an emergency. I have to literally make a schedule for my calls. But when it comes to meeting with someone, you can pretty much count on me being there if I made that obligation. Now, I know with everyone being busy, if plans are made way in advance it’s easy to forget. That is why confirming is so important.
Just don’t have someone confirm and you accept and still don’t make it. At this point you are just being plain boorish . Also, if you make this a habit, people will not ask you to come out anymore and you will be put in a category of friends marked “shit list”. I personally often do not confirm plans because I know how far I live, how much gas is, and how much time I really don’t have, unfortunately. If I lived closer to all my friends and associates then it would be easier to confirm plans with them. If you have situations like kids, location, husband etc, that keep you from really being able to make concrete plans then it’s best not to. And if you just decide you don’t feel like going out anymore you should just tell them. I think everyone is entitled to their moods. True friends would not force you to keep plans if you really don’t feel up to it for whatever reason. Just be honest, it’s better than using the avoidance tactic. It will make everyone’s life and relationships easier.
All Content © 2011 Marika Dye