Today, there are more and more individuals being created multi-racial and multi-cultured, it is almost shocking racism still exists. I happen to be born of both. Years back, remember the elections when Obama was appointed our new President? I want you to really go back to that day. I specifically want you remember that one day of togetherness we all had the opportunity to experience of all races, personalities, and cultures. Actually, that’s an emphasis on one day. Why? Because if you went back years with me just now, you will realize that it really was only one day that we all pretended to have world love of color. That’s what it really boiled down to being about if you think about it.
Then the next day and the days following became a racial awakening for me. The beautiful blue skies I saw turned into ugly dark clouds within hours even. I couldn’t be in forums or social network discussions without witnessing off color comments from even personal friends. I painfully figured out which side of the racial spectrum they really learned toward. It was quite agonizing to watch because some of these people were friends that I spent time with and shared my inner thoughts with. I started wondering how they truly felt about me or perhaps how they viewed me as a multi-racial person. Or did they even realize what they were saying and the impact of their outspoken thoughts?
At that time I think I had seen such an abundance of racism than I think I had in my whole life thus far. But, this very experience led me to a theory that there are two types of racism: hateful racism and ignorant racism. Some people were not raised around different types of people of different races. So how are you supposed to know how to think or what to say toward others if all you know is your racial background? However, that’s not really an excuse since there are resources you can use to educate yourself on other people. It is why I call it ignorance, especially if you have gone to school and learned how to read. It is also why I absolutely love reading and encourage that for others any chance I get. I yearn to learn—I want to understand mankind as much as I can before I leave this world. Hence, I have come to the conclusion that there are people in this world just don’t care.
Throughout my life I have had discussions on what race I should say that I am. But really it doesn’t matter because I am going to consider myself what I see fit. However, if I say mixed, people will argue with me and say that I am one race which is Black. So be it, if that’s what you want to call it. I call it mixed. When I see someone bi-racial—they are biracial. After the elections I even witnessed Black men complaining that we really don’t have a Black man in office, calling him absurd names. Then, others would say he is not Bi-racial, he is Black. So then, I think, yes, we do have a Black man in office according to the vast majority of society, which makes me the same generally speaking. I guess we all can view this at so many different angles, it’s kind of overwhelming.
On to the real purpose of this article—my story of being a woman of many different racial and cultural backgrounds.
I was born in Rochester, NY from a Jewish mother (whom is mixed) and briefly brought up around my Jewish Grandmother. That side of my mother’s family is Turkish and Israeli, which makes me part Middle Eastern. Now, every daughter born from a Jewish mother is Jewish, however, my father (whom is also mixed) made sure I always embraced being Black. He also let me know that by society people will often look at me as just a Black woman, so I understand that completely. There are those that don’t know what I am and when I explain I never exclude the fact that I am part Black. However, I refuse to exclude the other parts that make up who I am for many reasons.
The first time I faced racism was when I was at a school in Rochester, NY and all or majority of the children (as I can remember) were white. I never really looked at color until that moment because even the teacher treated me differently than all the other children and she made it pretty clear that it was because I was not like the other kids in my class. However, not because of my skin color, because it was slightly the same as their complexion, but because of my hair considering it was not straight like theirs. That is a moment I will never forget.
Nevertheless, when we moved to Japan on a military base, where I was majorly raised, I soon forgot about color because we were all from different backgrounds and all had the same struggle. We did not have time to judge each other on the color of our skin because we had other things to focus on and always found common ground. I am fortunate to have been raised in that kind of environment away from how ugly people can be.
However, it put me at a disadvantage.
When, I moved back to the US, (Jonesboro, GA to be exact) at fourteen years old, I inevitably felt racism again. I didn’t think I would since the school I went to had so many different types of people, and even people that dated were doing so inter racially. In my experience at that school I still don’t know how even some Black individuals look at me and now after Obama being in office, I don’t know how some Caucasian individuals look at me either. I haven’t had issues with any other racial groups, gladly.
To add, I am hesitant of how some Black individuals view me because in school my own people would often ask me “Why do you talk like that?” or would make fun of me because of how light I am, for example, they called me Powder, Casper, and the Invisible Woman. This type of ridicule pushed me to more so associate with mostly Caucasians, Latinos, and Asians. It then, made it hard to embrace my “Blackness”, and I am ashamed to share this even today.
However, I am not forgetting that I have also been with faced challenges from my non-black friends too; for instance, on many occasions I have been asked why I can’t wash my hair every day. Trust me it’s really bothersome to ask someone that repeatedly because it can be said in a way that can make a person feel dirty for not doing so.
Even today, still, I am faced with racism from the black side of me by having rigid remarks made about me in the Urban Entertainment Industry, hence, why I have worked for mostly Latin and Mainstream markets. Those markets have been much more accepting of me. I think today, we have racism even in our own groups, across the board. I would like to regret saying this and hope to one day be proved wrong. I’d like to see everyone come together or one day just forced to by default, because there will be a period maybe even our lives that everyone will be clearly mixed. I say “clearly” because there is this theory that everyone is mixed, maybe so but people are sure not claiming it obviously or else I would not be writing this right now.
I am also writing in hopes that you will get more of an understanding as to why others around you wish to embrace only certain parts of who they are. The question always has been, “Why is it that Black people only have the “ounce of Black blood theory” why isn’t it “ounce of Asian blood” or even “ounce of Hispanic blood” and so on?” You want to know what I think. Because that theory was made by someone who owned slaves and created a biracial child. That person he created a child with, of course was a slave; therefore, not wise to be claimed as his child. Therefore, the child is Black to justify him later also being a slave one day and not part of the family. Black people embrace this theory because of their struggles because we have earned our “blackness”. And we have justified it by saying the Black race is a dominant one making the race superior. I beg to differ; I feel like this is just a reminder to a negative era in history. I personally don’t like it and that every ethnicity is dominant in their own right due to each group having it’s historic struggles. Furthermore, the only way for me to deal with it is to greatly embrace all colors of which create the person I am. I think others should too and create the kind of harmony there was on election day every day!
All Content © 2010 Marika Dye
You look like you were talking to yourself… good thing I know it was me you were talking to! =)
LOL! yeah. I just wanted to put what I said so the that it flows as one thought.
haha I feel you I was just teasin! =)
Currently it looks like WordPress is the perfect blogging platform accessible right now. (from what I’ve read) Is that what you are utilizing in your blog?
Wow, wow and wow. What you wrote was AMAZING. Not that anyone else here that commented didn't write some compelling stuff but this hit me the most because what you said is SO much how I feel. You actually knocked pretty much every thought out of my mind and into this article. You shoulda wrote it. LOL.
This: Something which, in truth, could never be done, since he'll always be mixed regardless of anyone's personal opinion – something I personally see as a good thing. Lord knows that won't keep them from trying, though.
I LOVE IT. I need to save this and paraphrase this to everyone that gives me heck for saying I am mixed.
Remember my blog about having mixed parents didn't make me mixed according to what a friend of mine trying to tell me. I am going to post that but this goes so well with that article as well. I mean… we are what we say we are…. and what our parents are… DUH. We don't have to be confused. We should let it be known and own it no matter what Harry, Dick, or Sam says.
And yes, people should travel to places overseas like Canada, Jamaica and Brazil. You are so right! They are all shades, shapes, and races.
Yes, I remember that blog. I firmly believe that any attempt to deny OR claim an individual based upon skin color is, in itself, a racist act and that both are contributors to the proliferation of racism.
Yeah that blog was because of another mixed girl telling me what I need to claim… isn't that crazy!
Woow, my father is old fashioned and he encouraged me to consider myself Black but he never forced me to exclude any of my other races. I think he wanted me to make the choice. My mom is hip… hahaha…. and she could care less if I said I was purple. She likes me to do whatever makes me feel good. I think if that is what your upbringing is then that really forms what kind of thinking you will pass on to your child. Do you think Halle should know better or she is a victim o her upbringing?
Rom 3:4God forbid: yea, let God be true, but every man a liar; as it is written, That thou mightest be justified in thy sayings, and mightest overcome when thou art judged. t
he most high created the races and intends for our people to be holy (separate) from all the other nations… those so called brown and black peoples of the americas and carribean islands are the 12 lost tribes of the nation of israel!
Deu 14:2 For thou [art] an holy people unto the LORD thy God, and the LORD hath chosen thee to be a peculiar people unto himself, above all the nations that [are] upon the earth.
Hbr 13:8Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.
Christ only came to save his people from their sins Matt 1:21
so u can try and love these other people if you want it wont change that their nation has to pay for the crimes it has committed against the most highs people
Pro 11:21[Though] hand [join] in hand, the wicked shall not be unpunished: but the seed of the righteous shall be delivered.
I thnik that many people make their own segregation. People like to categforize themselves. African-American? Most have never been there. There are no working people today that were slaves, so they need to stop the attitude as America owes them something, and get over themselves. If we all want to know what people will look like in about another 100 years, then look at a Filipino, they have everything too, so we need to get used to it. There is no real pure race in this worl. With trade, invasions, occupation, slavery, and consential inter-racial relationships, we all are of some other race besides the one we show dominate traits of. We need to concentrate on being American, if we live here, and not on the race we are! Simularities are easier to share and have friends with than differences are.
Lee Daugherty
Multi-Racial ( Irish, Jewish, and Latin American)
First, I love how you put Jewish there as a race…. when most will debate that. An article I plan to post here. I told my Filipino now ex-fiancee that. He looks mixed. People always asked me what he was her assumed he was Hispanic. His mother looked mixed and his father looked more Guamanian than Filipino. We should concentrate on being American. I agree with you there. Especially in these times… it's the most important thing. I just like to see what mixes make who… it's interesting. Some people though would argue with you that there are people that are of ONE race. People have told me that.
Nice and interesting mix Lee!
Great article Marika!…I understand your plight in trying to understand the racial bigotry that goes on in our life here in the US. As you know, I'm black with latin ethnicity…my family is from Panama. I grew up as an Army Brat so I had to opportunity to travel all around the world and hang around all types of races and classes of people. Truth be told racism & bigotry is terrible all around the world…not just here in america. For our experience here in America, its pretty bad because of what i call the slave mentality. Here in America, the slave owner stripped slaves of all there culture and value compared to slaves in the Carribbean and south america whom were able to practice there traditional African Religions and way of life. Here in North america, they made you believe that if you an ounce of black blood that you were bad and not pure henceforth, the whole notion of 1% of black blood makes you black…its the opposite in places like Brazil and most other Latin american countries. For me and my experiences, I EMBRACE being BLACK for all its glory. I take on the roll as the so called underdog because I already know that many white folk are going question my validity no matter how successful in their society as the majority I have become. I LOVE that I went to, mix schools for grade school, an urban HS and then the top HBCU in the world, Howard University. Gives me great balance. Having learned the history of our people in America I have learned my place here and feel totally comfortable conversing about any subject, hanging around any race and just being ME, Cecilio Gill, a black latino enjoying life the best way he knows how in a bigoted and racist country. Again, great article Marika…just be you and dont worry about the bigots, racists and haters…just keep spreading love…it conquers all.
Hey! Thank you so much! And I appreciate reading this in it's entirety. I know it was much to take in. I really appreciate your take on this. I always looked at both you and Stacy as Panamanian actually. When I met your family and was around them speaking fluent Spanish, I didn't think anything different because you coming in different shades. I mean your whole family is much like mine… of all different colors and looks of mixed race. Thanks for clearing that up! I also didn't know that we both share a commonality as that we both are Army Brats so you really understand where I am coming from here. Being on base and off base are two totally different things. I am not saying being on base is heavy– it has it's downfalls. However, one downfall I did not experience was what I stated in this blog. I didn't until we were placed off base and I was going to "off base" schools. Therefore, that is all I can go off on. But I write these articles in hopes that people like you will give me a different outlook on life.
it is truly sad and unfortunate that so many individuals in this country are still driven by a racial divide…that the differences between people are not embraced and seen solely as variety instead of as a dividing line. It's even more sad that all people fail to recognize that there is virtually NO ONE on this planet – and especially in THIS country – who is completely, 100% "purebred" of their race and culture. It's ignorant and insane to think that somewhere along the line, one's ancestor couldn't have been of any other culture or color…or even more accurately, that we're not all descended from a common human ancestor. Instead, people should be more concerned with the personality and character of a person…for that is what determines a person's worth.
Bingo! You hit it on the nail. It's cool and interesting to know other people's backgrounds. I also think it's important to know your background. It is part of getting to know who you are. I don't think it's good to judge people off their background. We should be judged on our character if we must be judged. The question shouldn't be so what are you? It should be what have you done?
WOW! Ok, first let me say "Thank You" for sharing your story and experiences with racism and discrimination from black and white. In a way, I understand your struggle. I've always believed in the Dream of Dr. Rev. King and can say I have tried to live it. I have a best friend I call my sister, even tho she is white and we have a few other differences that are mostly philosophical. I love her as my sister b/c we are BOTH Trekkies and have so much in common and think out of the box all the time.
That said, as an adult, I have begun to feel a certain way with the elections and how the rampant racism has gone largely uncontested when it concerns Pres. Obama. Yes, he is black and bi-racial. He identifies himself as black and even took a black wife but he has NEVER shunned his white or other bi-racial family. He has shown love to his family whom still live in poverty in Africa, having called his brother George one of his best friends. But ever since his election, there have been people (mostly white) whom have questioned whether or not he is a Muslim (because of his last name) or even American (nevermind the fact that any elected official has to undergo an INTENSE vetting process). I've seen signs talking about assassinating him, depicting him as Hitler and a witch doctor and even calling him the N-word. It just strikes a discordant chord within me and makes me not want to associate with white people at all.
Those instances and others have made me wary of many whites. Including one instance when I've been called The N-word or random women clutching their purses tighter when I'm near or people denying me service and I could go on. Now don't get me wrong, I love everyone and can speak with anyone, regardless of color. But certain things in my life have made me see that, IMO, black is beautiful. I love black women because they have such beauty (and no, not ALL black women are beautiful to me, but alot are). I also see beautiful women of other races and if God were to present to me a wife of another race, I would be content. But my preference, tho malleable as preference SHOULD be, is for black women.
And Marika, I went through some similar as you with people calling me "white boy" because of my speech or my mannerisms or the fact that back then in High School, I liked only or mainly white females. I grew out of the color-struck phase and I know see the beauty of all women, particularly MY OWN women. Whether someone is mixed or not (we all are in America, we just don't always know it), we are still human.
I probably have more to say but for now, I will leave it here as it looks like I am rambling. LOL!
That was great and I am glad you could get that out! I would love to hear from people of other races on this article too. You'd be surprised that white people have gone thru racism too. White women who only like Black men probably have a story too. Couples go thru racism which will be another topic I will write about. Homosexuals go thru racism tho it's not a race but they are a group of people that are found to be different. I think I will do a series on this to involve everyone. I wanted to paint a picture in people's minds that I go thru it from BOTH sides. Unfortunately, Black people are racist even against Black people. In Jamaica, I learned that the one of lighter complexion don't like to mix with the ones of darker complexion. I watched my friend who at the time was with a dark skinned Jamaican get yelled at for bringing him to the house. He had to sit on the porch outside. I just feel people like to judge people and the easiest thing we can see is color. So that's the first thing to be judged. That's the one thing that makes us all appear different from each other.
And there are stigmas attached to all races. How we SHOULD talk, how we SHOULD dress, how we SHOULD act….. and so on.
If we don't then we are not like our own racial group. I think that's sad!
Great article, Marika! We could definitely talk effortlessly and endlessly on this very topic. I'm Creole and have a LOT going on in the gene pool. When I was a flight attendant, coming into contact with all types of races and cultures, I was mistaken for everything: Somalian, Ethiopian, Latina, Middle Eastern, Indian, and Pakistani… just to name a few. Someone even thought I was white with a deep dark tan (that was the funniest experience, ever).
In my family, our complexions range from extremely light skin (almost white) to dark brown. Some of my family members only identilfy with being Creole or Native American, while others only consider themselves black. I consider myself black, but like you, I love and appreciate the fact that so many races and cultures run through my veins.
My dad would be considered part Creole being that he comes from a French, Native American and Black background. His mother looks like Cher— she is French and Indian herself. If I had a family reunion and brought someone with me they would be very entertained I will tell you that. I remember when my now ex fiancee who is Filipino was wowed. And if you look at his family… and even his features you would think he was mixed with Latin, Native American, and Black. His family was even a mixture. I love to be a part of and see things like that. Reminds me of being home in Japan on the Army base. Funny, I have been mistaken for an Italian girl with a nice an. It's funny because my natural skin (if I didn't tan) is extremely light.
This is how much I don't see color… had no idea your girlfriend was Cuban and Black… she is very pretty. And if I go against Obama it's like I am going against my own race. So I hear you. I just try my best to watch what I say but I am not going to shut up when I feel a certain way about how he does his job. He is a person.. I am going against what he is DOING… not how he looks or what he IS.
You made me laugh when you said gayer than Elton John! ha! Cute… I like Elton John when he is being nice to people LOL.
We never even talk about it (race). We talk about important things….like her having too much clothing on for my tastes. LOL
You crack me up with that haha
hmm… Christian, your post is making me think. You're not wrong at all… just the part about mixing in Brazil … yes, from what I've read, most in Brazil know they are Brazilian, but even THERE, they DO have colorism… light vs. dark… and there are those there who embrace their African heritage. You can clearly see MANY in Brazil who CLEARLY look African-descendant… African culture plays a HUGE part on MODERN brazilian culture… from the music, to fashion to dance…There's Asian-Brazilians… and there's Brazilians who, like my friend Vanessa, are clearly white or German/Portuguese.. Not everyone in Brazil is mixed, despite what you said. We can say how people in other countries designate themselves but racism and colorism is EVERYWHERE… even in Puerto Rico, Cuba, Colombia, Dominican Republic and other places. They might identify NATIONALLY what they are, but phenotypically they will say something else ALL TOGETHER, denying other parts of themselves… no matter what they look like or who they're blood related to.
I never said everyone in Brazil is mixed; I said that so many in Brazil are mixed that nobody cares about race anymore. Of course they have varying colors in Brazil – a beautiful thing – but that doesn't mean they hate each other because of it or that they consider it any significant difference between them.
In Brazil, they collectively celebrate their heritage – African, Portuguese, European and Indigenous. Carnival itself is a glorious blend of Parisian, Portuguese, African, Catholic, Candomblé and Spiritism; male and female, rich and poor. Once a year, for 4 days, their great melting pot is stirred completely and anybody can be anything and everything. This is their greatest and most beloved holiday… and it's all about blending together and celebrating their brazilian phenotype rather than being divisive and separating themselves into hereditary genotypes.
Fact is, the Brazilian government has no legislation whatsoever in regard to classifying races: it's a moot point after hundreds of years of racial mixing. So, while you personally might prefer to classify them based upon the color of their skin, the Brazilians themselves couldn't care less. It's meaningless to the vast majority of them. Hopefully, someday, the U.S. won't have any silly racial checkboxes on their government forms, either.
Christian, with all due respect, you are NOT getting my point.
Did you see where I said there is STILL colorism there? Light vs. Dark. You're confusing things. Yes, we are all HUMAN but because of THAT we see the outside differences. That does NOT negate the fact that Brazil ALSO had history of having African slaves. What YOU see as a melting pot is more complex than that. Saying that, Colorism is VERY much alive in Brazil and other Latin countries. What are the main faces of Brazilians you see? Mostly those who are lighter than myself or look European. The same with Puerto Rico and Cuba. If you see someone who identifies themselves as Brazilian or Puerto Rican (not you but in general), and they look as dark as me and have African features, then most people would see them as BLACK! The Africans of the TransAtlantic Slave Trade went all throughout the western Hemisphere, so if you're a descendent of those Africans, then you are "black". I have friends who are Dominican and Brazilian and they've both told me there is colorism and even RACISM in their home countries. What we as touristas or outsiders see is simplified through the lens of American apartheid. But what is THERE is just as complex as anything we deal with here in the U.S.
And I agree with you with this: Hopefully, someday, the U.S. won't have any silly racial checkboxes on their government forms, either.
Report
Seeing outside differences and caring about outside differences are two completely different things. You see that descendent of African slaves as "black"; I see them as a person with one African ancestor.
My only hope is that they won't look at me and see me as a barbarian, simply because all of my ancestors were Vikings.
But Christian… that person is STILL the descendant of Africans brought over by force. ONE African Ancestor? So if the person I know who looks as African as I do, and Africa itself is home to the greatest amount of Genetic Diversity in the world, who is from Brazil btw, says to me she is not of African descent (she knows she is) I should just accept that? If you're African or of African descent and LOOK it… you ARE black. Black isn't a nationality, it's what you are. Everyone on the planet is derived from Africans and only look different because of Micro-evolution.
We have different experiences, Christian, and I understand and accept that. I love being black and you love being mixed. We see the world differently but I think we both have hope for the future of the world. Where color means NOTHING.
…and therein lies my point: if we're all one people, why are some so desperate to differentiate? Doesn't that further PROMOTE racism? If we all truly originated in Africa, then we're the same, aren't we?
My people – along with a large percentage of European immigrants – came here to escape slavery; yours escaped it once they got here. We're not nearly as different as you might think. Just because Africans still practice slavery today doesn't mean they have a historical corner on the market. My family was sharecropping – another form of slavery – in Norway for hundreds of years before scraping together enough to the US to start a better life, yet I don't choose to find my identity in being the descendant of slaves.
As for your friend, my answer would be yes, you should accept that. If she chooses not to cling to her melanin as a means of personal identity, then I say good for her. Color means NOTHING to her… or to me.
Ok, one thing, Christian… my people didn't escape slavery once they got here. They were brought over here AS slaves and were kept as slaves for over 200 years in this country. But the thing is, OUR slavery is continued. It's a long and deep history that I hope I can share with you one day without the confines of this webform. Trust me, you would NOT like it. And what most people think of as Africans selling other Africans as slaves to the Europeans to bring to the U.S. is not as clear cut as that, at least not in the beginning.
And after we were finally freed as slaves in this country, some of my people were sharecroppers as well. But the ugly face of white supremacy kept us down with unjust laws and Jim Crow. The mental effects of slavery have trickled down to the present day and we still suffer from it. But how do you break those shackles for EVERYONE in this country? That is the question.
And I love my skin and the history associated with it because it is SO rich and wonderful, despite the ugliness of which it is mixed with. Doesn't mean I want continued division. I have my preference to black women as a romantic interest but a PREFERENCE is malleable. I see beautiful non-black women like Rosa Acosta or Suelyn Madeiros or Scarlett Johanssen or Michelle Rodriguez or Yang Ziyi or Jamie Chung or Jessica Biel. But I also see beautiful black women like Nona Gaye or Gina Torres or Elise Neal or Khrysti Hill or Regina King or Taraji P. Henson or Angela Bassett or Nia Long or Sanaa Lathan.
The point is, until racism and colonialism and color are completely stamped out, there can be no end to this mess. You won't be free to like to who you like or won't be free from being turned down for a job based on your skin color or where you come from or what kind of name you have (being turned down for having a name like Shaniqua or Devonte). It's going to take a LONG time and part of that change is overcoming and DESTROYING the stereotypes that plague minorities.
Personally, i think racism is at least partly being held together by politics. I grew up in a pretty multi-diverse neighborhood, actually being white at my schools, i was in the minority. Maybe i was too young and naive, but racism really didn't seem to exist…at least not with the kids. To this day, i don't know anyone who is racist, but maybe that's more of the company i keep than it is reality. The people i call friends or associate with, just don't care and it's not an issue. The only time i ever hear of racism, is on the political scene. I am "white" (Russian/German/French Canadian/blah blah blah) and we are a dying race…there's no denying that, but really…i don't care. Mixed couples make beautiful babies, almost as if that's the way it was supposed to happen in the first place. Just my 3 cents…
I love to read view points like this … to know that we all go thru adversity when it comes to racism and people rejudging…
And when I was young I think I was too naive to really realize some comments that were made to me by the kids I was hanging out with too… but my parents raised me in a very Kumbiya type of way. I really didn't know what was going on until I was moved to the states and then back to Japan and then back to the states to actually see a difference.
I love that you said interracial relationships make beautiful mixed babies. xo
I'm with you on the beautiful babies, AM. My friends even had a "Breed out racism!" t-shirt made for me. lol
You have a shirt like that for real?
Yup!
I agree that it's partially held together by politicians. How many times have we seen a Willie Horton ad or questioning Obama's birth or what religion he is, or continuing to fight things that help all Americans b/c of fear mongering on the minorities (such as saying crime will rise if the ATL transit system is open 24/7 like in NYC)? Politicians play on our worst fears and part of those fears are racial in essence.